It all happens too fast...

Last year was about FUN...tis year i'm getting d feel of HOPEFUL to PAINFUL  to HEARTLESS love n BROKEN frenships....It's nt wad i wan!! I wana SHOUT to da world...n confess everything!!
I neva mean to lie to u...to cheat u...OR to take anything u love most away frm u...i DONT MEAN ANY HARM....i neva felt to wan to hurt anybody...bt nw it's like happening by ITSELF...
To cure tis is to let go everything i'm holdin onto nw...bt i couldnt do it...it's too hard...coz if i let go all...i hurt others....bt if i dun let go...
I ALSO hurt others!! WTF!!! Why??!!! Cant things jz b normal??? it sucks ya noe!!
Is there any other way to solve tis TWISTED problem??? I'm screwing up my own life...n i duno hw it's doin it by itself....I'm messing up my days wit tons of problems after prob...I'm so FUCKING hate it!!!!

It's been more than 3 days since i last wrote a post

3 days off9 seems like 1 year i didnt on...lolx..duno why...especialy when i didnt go check out my fb...i felt like i lost contact wit d world n so eager to noe wats happening alredi on fb...it also felt like i am so out dated dy....haha...Last few days had sum pain-in-the-head prob...bt i solved it all...haha..so smart of me eh?? ><" Btw i'm so stressed out at everything..i lost contect wit my studies coz of sum personal prob i had wit my frens n lover...Bt i'm all ok nw...hope i continue to b ok n better in da future..

Ytrdy our skol had CNY thingy stuff...i did sumthing tat i made her so angry..bt later i apologize to her dy..luckily she 4gave me...if nt i duno wad to do dy...I promised her tat i wun do tis again...N i will keep to my word...I really had a rough day recently..but bcuz of her...i manage to get through all my probs...thx lao po....love u d most...haahha...

Nw i hv to concerntrate bak on my studies...nid to get my head bak in the world which i hate most..n i wana concerntrate bak on my road of love...nid to get her love...nid to win her heart...coz i wana b d bez person in her life....bt hw m i goin to make it all come true?? it's so hard...so much pressure cuz i noe her ex means alot to her...it made me feel so imposssible to win her heart....n i hate tat feeling alot...makes me look like a loser n a lame kid....Yikes~~!! tell me hw m i goin to make tis impossible thing bcum possible??? I dun hv d guts to show her..to prove to her...i tried dy...i tried really hard...forcing myself alot till i gt headache...n i onli hv d mind n guts to write all my heart thoughts in tis blog....where she'll read n und...bt i reali wan her...she's everything to me...she means alot to me....

Help n Thx...~

I'm gettin more n more confuse...
1 minute i'm thinkin of u..
Next minute i'm thinkin of another person..
N d next minute i think of sum1 else...
Bt 1 BIG prob..these ppl r celebrities (U noe WHO ) n skol frens...
I duno wad my heart wans nw..
I no longer feel like i'm myself dy..
I'm lost..drowned into my ownself...
Who can help me get out of this misery??
I cant think much...coz i dun wana make things worst..
My body's on fire..hotter than u..
I cant take tis heat in me....
I'm goin crazy...i think SO MUCH..
In jz 1 day...
Pls cum bak...i nid u...to help me...
I noe..onli u can help me....
Coz v both r d FREAKS n WEIRD ones in tis world....
Which also means "special" in a way..
Haha....
Bt of cuz....v r jz frens....gd buddies dat r crazy funny...
Cum bak n pull me out of tis hot water i'm drowning into...
Day by day...things gets GLOOMIER...
n darker...
I dont hv much time...
Guess i'll hv to turn to God...coz He's ALWAYZ...
The solution to all my probs...He helps me without me noticing...
I managed to survive through hard times bcuz of U, Lord....
I love u so much....thx for choosing me...
thx for everything u've given me...
Thx for every opportunity....
I'm grateful to u...ntg is better than U....
Bt i pray...tat everyday is GD n a HAPPY day for me...

My Love...i'm still waiting like u...

After so many years of loving you,

After so many things we've been through,
Still I couldn't find the reason,
Tell me why am I in so much love with you?
The day you left me,
My eyes felt like crying,
The day I lost you,
My heart cracks n inconsoable,
Come back my love,
Someone's still waiting for you.
Come back my love,
Someone will always wait for you.

Colours of The Love!

Love!



Love can be red, like the intense heat of a passionate kiss
.....the color of sweetness
.....the color of strawberries

Love can be blue, like the comfort we take in a pair of denim jeans
.....the color of strength
.....the color of perfect skiesLove can be yellow, bright and warm like the morning sun
.....like the sounds of laughters of children on the merry-go-round
.....like the sounds of fun from the boys flying kites in the open
fields

Love can be green, peaceful and serene I can hear your heart beats
.....it is the feeling of a loving hand that touch a grieving heart
.....it is the whispering of trusting words to a distressing soul

Love can be orange, the loudness of it can drive you up a wall
.....it can drive you to sing like nobody is listening
.....it can drive you to dance like nobody is watching

Love can be purple, the courage we need to love bravely and unselfishly
.....the moment I first kiss you i know that i am not afraid to risk involvement .....the day the declaration of your love for me was made known to the world

Read her DIRTY thoughful IRRATIONAL / Rational suspicious sentimental Mind....

Ofcourse u dont und women..sometimes tehy cant even explain themselves...bt ofthen their secrets r universal, like these 25 things she wishes u knew...
1. PLEASE LISTEN TO ME-Not bcuz wat i'm about to say will rock ur world, bt bcuz listening is a sign of respect that ROCKS my world...

2. WOMEN SPEAK A DIFFRENT DIALECT THAN MEN-For example, " I;m fine..." means "i'm so not fine," just as "No dessert for me" means "I'll b polishing off yours"...

3. REMEMEBR PMS STANDS FOR "PHYSICAL N MENTAL STRESS.." - So let me cry freely, behave irrationaly and eat ur dessert. My mood swings are hormonal , not personal...

4. MAANICURES AND PEDICURES ARE A WOMEN'S GIFT TO HER MAN- I love lookin pretty for u. The time to worry is when i stop going for dem...

5. ALWAYZ TELL ME WHEN I LOOK HOT - never tell me when i dont. and dont foget i nid 20 compliments to offset 1 thoughtless remark.

6. I REMEMBER THE SHIRT U WERE WEARING - when u 1st said "i love u" ..the fact tat u dont makes me question whether u mean it.

7. I LOVE U LONG BFORE I TOLD U- playin the long game is in a woman's DNA. We dont throw a Hail mary in the first quater . (and u thought v didnt know football)

8. OFCOURSE UR THE BEST LOVER I EVER HAD - all others cease to exist when i fall in love.

9. I'LL NEVER TELL U MY TRUE NUM- Never! never! Never! besides, see #8.

10. I READ UR HOROSCOPE EVERYDAY.

11. I SECRETLY DELIGHT WHEN - the "maitre d" slips up and calls Mr n Mrs.

12. SPONTANEOUSLY KISS MY NECK- frm behind and i might let u stay back there for a while...

13. YES, MY GIRLFRIEND KNOWS WHAT V DID- last night. We share everything, including that.

14. MAKE ME LAUGH AND I'M HAPPY- Laugh at urself n i'm all urs...

15. A LITTLE JEALOUSLY IS GOOD- if (a) no kneecaps r broken and (b) u dont cross-examine me to exhaustion. The right balance  shows u care, and it's even flattering.

16. I DONT WITHOLD SEX TO PUNISH U- sometimes i juz nid to b left alone bt at the same time nt left alone...an d no, i cant explain that...

17. I CAN, WILL, AND DO FAJE IT- like when Gossip Girl is starting.Would u rather i fake headache???

18. I LOVE SEX.- with or without u, as Bono might say. My mind is filthier than u might think.

19. URE IRRESISTABLE : freshly showered, doing somthing sporty or strenous, smiling, charming the old lady frm d third floor, suited, readin the business section, DIY-ing....

20. DO U WAN FLOWERS?? - kills romantic gesture. Dont ask juz do it...

21. I'LL PROBABLY B LATE - bcuz i'm preparing for u. Aleast that's how i reason. My reasoning skills are phenomenal!!

22. IF U CHEAT- i may nt break up wit u, bt u'll wish i had.

23. I ONCE KISSED A GIRL and like d taste of her cherry ChapStick, No, i didnt. that's ure fantasy. Sincerely sry.

24. HERE'S HOW TO FIX what ure doi wrong in be : when u go slow,go slower...When u go fast, go fatser..

25. I FEEL LUCKY TO HAVE U- an i hope u feel the same. U cant hv it all unless u hv some1 to share it with...

Just so u know....i dont noe how to b fine...

I shouldn't love you but I want you

I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move

I can't look away

It's too hard for me

To just turn and forget all that i've ever felt
And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not

'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

Just so you know

This feeling's taking control of me

And I can't help it

I won't sit around, I can't let u go
Can i chase after you?

Will you let me??

Thought you should know

I've tried my best to let go of you
But I don't want to
I just gotta say it all

It's getting hard to be around you

There's so much I can't say

Do you want me to hide the feelings

And look the other way

This emptiness is killing me

And I'm wondering why I've waited so long
Looking back I realize
It was always there but just never spoken
I'm waiting here...been waiting here....

Edited lyrics...bt jz for fun...i dont mean anything bout tis..haha...

My friends say I’m a fool to think

that you’re the one for me

I guess I’m just a sucker for love

‘Cuz honestly the truth is that

you know I’m never leavin’

‘Cuz you’re my angel sent from above

Baby you can do no wrong

Coz your already so perfect in a way

Give you little more because I love ya, love ya

With me, girl, is where you belong

Just stay right here

I promise my dear I’ll put nothin above ya

Love me, Love me

Say that you love me,

Fuck me, Fool me

Oh how you do me,

Kiss me, Kiss me

Say that you miss me,

Tell me what I wanna hear

Tell me you love me,

People try to tell me
but I still refuse to listen

Cuz they don’t get to spend time with you

A minute with you is worth more than

a thousand days without your love, oh your love

My heart is blind but I don’t care
‘Cuz when I’m with you everything has disappeared

And every time I hold you near

I never wanna let you go,

Hey hey...Read tis...

(True story)

I hv sum frens...their name r...
Hoo,Too,Boo!!!
Hahah...does it sounds like "who to boo???"
HAhaa....go boo dem la...
Or mayb u change reverse it...
Boo,Too,Hoo = "Boo to who??"
HAhha....my mind is jz too gd at it....
Or Too Hoo Boo???
Sounds like To Who Boo (a person's name)???
Hahaha...if u still remember tat Monster Inc...
There's a little gal name BOo...rite??
Haha...Lolx...

Ladies n gentlemen...say it wit me...
Hoo,Too,Boo!!!

"who to boo???"
OR....
Boo,Too,Hoo
"Boo to who??"
HAhahha.....

Tdy...ntg much happend...

Haiz...bored to death..tmrw goin out wit my buddies...haha...atlast can go out again..whole day at skol like a zombie la....when tcher talkin...i kept nodding my head coz i was sleepin..inside my head d mode keep on
SLEEP...AWAKE...SLEEP..AWAKE...Haiz!!! Even my eyes dah gt eye bags..n 1 is bigger than d other...so cacat..luckily nt obvious..coz i'm wearing specs....Ahahaha...

So hard to pay attention...d words go into my head n came out d other way...Head so pain...coz tryin to stay awake...i dun wana let tcher call my name n scold me....tat would b embrassing...so so la....

Haix..btw i cant take tis anymore...I HATE U....I WAN U OUT OUT OUT OF MY LIFE!!! URE MAKING MY EVERY DAY SO SUFFERING!!! Argh!!! I met sum1 new..(awww...when can i meet her again??) n i dun nid u...coz i hate u...n u dun nid me...so v're better off....GET LOST...GET RID...BUZZ OF IDOIT!!

Ok...i nid to cool down anyway....Well let me tell u sumthing..I'MA BIG BIG FAN OF TARZAN N BEN10!!! hahaha....i noe it's kinda childish of me to say tis...bt TARZAN has been my mentor ever since small...tatz y i'm so weird...i luv to climb n act like Tarzan...Oh YEa~~!! I duno y i'm so obsess wit dem...i juz love dem alot...haha...n i also LOVE MEGAN FOX!! haahha....so hot n sexy n tasty...~~ MmMmmm....

In my world i wan u...(made up)

I thought sometime alone

was what we really needed
you said this time would hurt more than it helps
but I couldn't see that
I thought it was the end
of a beautiful story
and so I left the one I loved at home to be alone

But little did i know
I felt that i was wrong bout what i juz did
Tried to turn around
Wana go back...to the time where..

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else

I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart

In world...only u exist
Cant think of other ppl..juz u..
N ic ant blame u if u turn away frm me
I can only prove wad i say is true
Pls b mine

Your so different from the others
So special
So sweet
So cute
So lively

Y is that so??
Well i dont know either
You juz sorta came into my mind all the time
Appearing everywhere i look
I imagine you all the time
Imagine you doin this n that
Over here n there

You healed my heart
Make me happy n laughed alot
With evry simple actions you do
Nw's my turn to do the same
Giv me a chance
Let me into your world
Melt your hard n cold heart
Giv you a brand new heart
With lots of love in it

I'm gonna make this true
If u will let me b with you
I dont wan others
I juz wan you
Only you...

Little Cupcake..

Things seemed strange this morning

As I packed my bags for school
The smiles I'm used to seein just weren't there
I heard my mum talking
I was feeling kinda helpless n useless
So heartbroken

I never thought that it'd be easy

Cause we're both so distant now
And the walls are closing in on us and we're wondering how
No one has a solid answer
But just walking in the dark
And you can see the look on my face, it just tears me apart
Tears my heart too

So we fight,we cry
Through the hurt
We learn
And we try and try and try and try
So it's up to you and it's up to me

That we meet in the middle

So tell me how could I ever be normal somehow
So tell me why am I in tears?

Whoa, so far away and now I just need you here
I felt so far away

From where we used to be
And now we're standing
And where do we go?
When there's no road
To get to your heart
Let's start over again



Where are you now

When I need you the most
When nothing is going right
Why don't you take my hand
I want to be close

I cant see the light

Help me when I am down
Lift me up off the ground
Teach me right from wrong
Help me to stay strong
Take my hand and walk with me

Babe give me a hug

I need it..I dont wana go off without you
Cuz when I stare in your eyes

It couldn't be better
Then to continue lookin at your wonderful eyes

About the words that I just heard
Above all the whispers i could imagine you

Your smile,touch,those lovely eyes,perfect body
N your warm heart beating in your ownself


I got my favorite girl

Not feelin' no pain no fear
Don't have a care in the world

Why would I, when you are here
Girl i dont wana turn back
I dont wana leave you
And i dont want you to leave me
I wana you to b right by my side with me 4 as long as possible

Girl I promise

I can take ya to the movies
We'll be there holding hands
I'll walk you home from school
I'll walk you to your classes
Playing with my friends but yeah you'll be my best friend
Just a fraction of your love
You'll shine in my life totaly 
But most of all babe gurl you'll be my love love love ....

You're my favorite part of the day

And every morning i look forward to seeing your face
I just need to see it some more
Babe I'm the kind of guy who could appricate a girl as
Amazing as you
So you gotta be my babe yeah
Yeah we'll already be chillin at the beach
I'll take you on a cruise we'll sit while we be eating
You can anything you want girl I'll be your best friend

I'm...
The one that makes you laugh
The one that  fixes your heart
The one that is important in your heart
The one that wont hurt you

The one that has your back
The one that love you a thousand times more than anyone
The one who would rather die
Than make you sad

Girl,
The only thing that hurts me is you weren't here
Not talking and ignoring me
Cant take a hug without kisses from you
When I close my eyes I see me and you
There's so many thoughts in my mind
The night of a dream
Give your first kiss to me
I'll be gentle I know we gotta do it slowly if you give me
Gurl..I'll cherish every moment
Cause i know it happens once a while..

The two us remember?
Everybody says that we look cute together let's make this a night
I'm tellin' you our parents will never know before the lights go off

And the music turns off now's the perfect time for me to taste
Your lips, your touch in my hand right here
Gurl just one word
I LOVE YOU....<3<3

It rhymes...Fighting for choco..

Tittle: Fighting for Choco's......

My fren said....
"You ar,....din let you eat(choco) then call me sui po.."
"Let you eat then XXXXX~~~"
"Humph~~"

Me...
"Hahaha....so funny...."
"It's rhymes..."

The end..

Bad thoughts...i wish RAT is here to help me sort out problems...

Rat~

(u noe who u r)

It's been crazy nw.....since ur happily n busily doin ur shoppin...

I'm dying here...nid ur medication immediately...

Or giv me any drugs tat numbs my heart..

I keep hving bad thoughts.....
What did i do??I'm sry...
I noe i cant lie...bt i will force myself to lie..
No matter how hard it hurts..
O tears may fall n hearts will break..
I dun wan to go through it again...

Sick n tired...
I can neva look at u again...
What do i hv to say?
I cant think..
It's a bad feeling...
How is it goin to stop??

Erasing u away...
Dont hv to feel sry..
Dont remember me...
Juz by rememberin bak lsst time....
Has given me nightmares....
Over n over again..

How much does my heart hurts??
I cant tell...coz it's too much to say in words...
What should i do??What should v do??
Stare in space? or turn n leave....

Pretend ntg ever happen...
Look sumwhere else....
I dont like wad i'm doin nw...even if i die....
Bt d heart jz seems to hurt sumhow....At everything i did...
It's stupid...so dumb...

Will u stab me in d heart?As deep as possible?
I dun wan to feel anything anymore..
Coz i will hurt myself for stupid reasons...
N i dun like to c myself tat way....

Wan the right LIFE for sure....

I'm goin to make time for u...
Ur love so deep...
I wil nt break ur heart..
Gurl I Love U...
Giv u ervything u nid...
I'll b rite by ur side...

Bt nw...i'm confused...
Nt sure which path to take...
Cupcake..should i continue wit wad i feel nw??
Or should i jz let it go??
I dun wan to make d wrong decision n hurt myself o u...
I cant think straight...
I cant think rite...
I dun know what to do!!!

I guess it's up to u to make d decision...